Most people think spontaneity is the key to better sex. They're wrong. Planning and preparation is what separates an orgasm from an orgasp! You can be spontaneous with food, for example, but not if you forgot to buy it.
Here's an example of P&P Sex (planning and preparation): Let's say you both had "fun with food" on your erotic wish lists. First, make a grocery list.
Buy food of every texture, smell and taste imaginable — soft, hard, chewy, salty, sweet, bitter. Best bets: maraschino cherries, Jell-O, strawberries, peppers, curly pasta (cooked, don't be cruel), grapes (seedless, don't be mean), eggs (boiled, don't be hateful), and olives (pitted, don't be heartless).
Yogurt, for example, can create a sensuous goo for two bodies to slide together. Champagne sipped from foreskin presents a decadent type of, ahem, stemware. Chilled fruit can cause quite a sensation when inserted into various orifices and withdrawn with a warm tongue.
Now that you've got the food, what do you do with it?
Head to the kitchen floor. You'll take turns, but let's start with him. Have your partner sit with his back to the wall. You can blindfold him, but it's more powerful if he simply closes his eyes and trusts you.
Now, feed him a piece of each food. But don't just feed; tease. Take a grape and tap it from the bridge of his nose to his lips before plopping it in his mouth. Let the syrup run on his chin before feeding him a spoonful of maraschino cherries. Encourage him to play with the food by licking his lips, sticking out his tongue and savoring the flavors.
Two rules for him: eyes shut and no hands. He's not allowed to touch you. The secret to making it sexy is to deprive him of some senses (touch and sight) while enhancing the others (smell and taste). The unpredictability of what you'll do next also creates a thrilling anticipation. You won't believe how sexy it is to hold a plastic bottle of honey, ask that he stick his tongue out and watch the honey ooze out and pool in his tongue.
Make sure you wash down the food with different liquids — milk, juice, water. For added effect, drink some wine, hold it in your mouth and squirt it into his.
Whether your sexual fantasy is about trying a roll or a role, do some basic prep work. For instance:
If you think you might throw your love onto the dining table in a moment of mad passion, you might weight test the platform once or twice and reinforce as required. Nothing shatters the mood like collapsing furniture — or picking splinters out of each other's asses.
Have lube ready at various stations, always within easy reach.
If you intend to play with something like handcuffs, stash keys in strategic places around the house.
Minimize potential interruptions. Clear your schedule. Turn the phones off. Don't order food for delivery. Don't answer the door unless it's the local fire brigade.
Plan for the afterglow. Some activities can be rather intense and your partner can feel a little silly or panicky afterward. Bring the mood down slowly and gently. Have a talk, a cuddle, a snack. And for God's sake, tip the delivery boy.
Now that we're at the end of our series, the secret to great sex is worth repeating: It's not what you do to me but where you take me. In other words: Free your mind. Your crotch will follow.